Hard is NOT the Same as Impossible

Most of us do not go looking for hard things. We prefer comfortable, familiar and of course predictable. We like knowing what we are doing. We like feeling capable and we especially like situations that do not make our stomach flutter or expose the uncomfortable truth that we may not be very good at something, at least yet.

I believe all of the above.

But I have noticed something.

If we avoid everything that feels difficult, we may also avoid discovering what we are capable of. The funny or not so funny thing is that hard things will find us eventually. I guess this is part of being human. Life will deliver challenges we did not request, schedule or feel prepared to handle. It is not all out of our control.

There are hard things that we can choose.. We can do hard things intentionally, not because the struggle is noble, or that we need to prove our worth, or that suffering earns us a medal.

We choose hard things because courage needs exercise, confidence needs evidence and resilience is built through use. The hard things we choose can help prepare us for the hard things we do.

Too often we look at something difficult and decide we are not strong enough to do it.

Do we have the order backward?

We do not always become strong before we face the hard thing. Sometimes (most of the time), we become strong because we face it. And we learn that discomfort is survivable. We discover that frustration is not failure. WE begin to understand that struggling with something does not not mean we are incapable of doing it. After all it may simply mean we are learning.

Remember hard is not the same as impossible. It is not necessarily a warning to stop. Perhaps hard means we are growing.

Choose your hard, An intentional hard thing does not have to be enormous or dramatic. It could be as simple as lifting a heavier weight, learning unfamiliar technology, entering a room where you do not know anyone, trying something you do not do well, or beginning again after stopping. The goal is not to overwhelm ourselves. It is to keep stretching the edges of what feels possible.

Do not underestimate yourself before you begin. I often see people decide they cannot do something before they have given themselves the opportunity to try. They predict failure and call it realism. Or confuse being inexperienced with being capable. Or how about this, they see someone else’s mastery and use it as evidence that they should never or could never become a beginner.

Please remember this, everyone who does something well was once awkward, uncertain, and/or struggling.

So I beg you not to underestimate yourself before you begin.

You do not need proof that you can complete the journey. You only need enough courage to take the next step. The doing may become the proof.

So what hard thing will YOU choose? Ask yourself: What have I been avoiding simply because it feels difficult? Is it truly beyond me, or am I uncomfortable being a beginner? What is a step I could take before I feel ready? Who might I become if I try? Again, know this, you do not have to conquer the whole hard thing today. You do not have to be fearless. You do not have to feel or look graceful while learning. Nope! You only have to STOP using “hard” as another word for “never”.

Do hard things intentionally and you may discover that the hard thing was never an obstacle. It was an invitation to meet the person you are still becoming.

💚 The Accidental Blogger