An Uncaged Woman is Not Always Comfortable

WHY? Because “Uncaging” is not glitter, confidence, empowerment quotes and dramatic breakthroughs. Sometimes it is really awkward, sketchy, messy, and unfamiliar cuz it is the consequence of change, growth, recalibration and deeper truth.

Are You THINKING…

“Oh so, discomfort does not mean I’m failing. Right! It may mean I am expanding.” That right there creates a beautiful emotional arc. It creates awareness, recognition, and expansion. That in fact is movement building and fodder for future story telling.

Sometimes “uncaging” means disappointing others, changing your mind, speaking up as your voice trembles, trying technology and feeling foolish, saying NO after decades of saying yes, becoming visible after years of hiding, letting people misunderstand you, and evolving publicly.

That is real.

In fact, discomfort may be one of the first signs that the cage door has opened.

And then perhaps the truth is, many women become so accustomed to shrinking that freedom itself can and will initially feel uncomfortable and may actually cause guilt.

Taking up space feels unfamiliar and terrifying. Having options feels risky. Prioritizing joy feels selfish. Visibility feels vulnerable.

But here is the “thing”. Uncomfortable does not mean wrong. Sometimes uncomfortable simply means new.

I think one of the greatest misunderstandings about confidence is believing confident people feel comfortable all the time. I no longer believe that is true. I think many confident people are simply willing to feel uncomfortable without abandoning themselves and their dreams.

That realization changes everything. Because suddenly the goal is no longer: “Never feel fear.” The goal becomes: “Do not let fear make all your decisions.”

I present my current favorite quote by George Adair, 1800’s. “Everything you always wanted is on the other side of fear.”

Soooooooo, maybe an uncaged life is not about becoming fearless or perfectly confident. Maybe it is simply about becoming less willing to abandon ourselves in order to stay comfortable. AND, perhaps that is the real work of aging boldly: Ya know, learning to choose growth over shrinking, authenticity over approval, and possibility over fear. AND, YES, even when, and especially if, it feels sketchy and uncomfortable.

“Be too much. Be extra.”

Suz xo